RESIDENT EVIL: UNIT MANUALS
by Hao is hot
Summary: A sieries of Unit manuals; like, if all the characters hwere androids to be sold to the public.  Request Characters, cause I can't pick an order. T for general Teen stuff.
1. DEPARTMENT MANAGERS NOTE

DEPARTMENT MANAGERS NOTE

After the wide-ranged success of our games here at CAPCOM, and with the increasing improvement the Japanese are doing with AI (Artificial Intelligence), CAPCOM decided to develop and market android's with the likeliness and personal aspects of their characters; we call them UNIT's. The department that manufactures these UNIT's is CAPCOMS' UNIT PRODUCTION DEPARTMENT.

We discovered shortly after first releasing some of our UNIT's, that they can become rather dangerous when mishandled, so we developed UNIT MANUALS for our UNIT's, which are advised to be read. In this 'fanfiction' we will provide a selection of the manuals form the RESIDENT EVIL range.

So continue on, and enjoy.

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Ok, These are fictional (although we wish they were), I have no right to any of the character's (though I wish I did).

**READ THIS BIT:**

I've only done two and am working on the next one. I would like everyone to request who's manual I write next. I'm putting Wesker up first, because I did him first, and it's Wesker.

SO yeah, REQUEST! or I'll put them up in any order.

I'm ALSO doing the girls. so please don't just give me the guys to do.


	2. ALBERT WESKER UNIT MANUAL

**WESKER UNIT GUIDE**

MANUAL NO: 1154 3V1L AW

UNIT: ALBERT WESKER

PRICE: $200.00 (for alternate payment options, please contact our help line stated on packaging)

MANUFACTURER: _CAPCOM: UNIT PRODUCTION DEPARTMENT_

MAKERS NOTE

Good day and thank you for purchasing your ALBERT WESKER UNIT, we do hope you enjoy your unit to a satasfactory level. In this manual we will be giving you crutial tips and guidance to having a long and happy existance with your ALBERT WESKER UNIT. Do note, it is STRONGLY advised you read this manual, as ALBERT WESKER UNIT's can become volitial and quite lethal to it's user if mistreated, betrayed or just genrealy pissed off.

UNIT SPECIFICS

NAME: Albert Wesker

MANUFACTURED SINCE: 1960

HIGHT: 6ft (183cm)

WEIGHT: 186ibs (84.5kilograms)

BASE APEARENCE: Cocason male, Blonde, normaly slicked back hair, well toned body. Eye colour's can vairy from Orange-red catlike to Stone Blue, depending on the modle purchased.

UNIT SUB-GROUPS: "RESIDENT EVIL", "S.T.A.R.S.", "UMBRELLA", "EVIL", "COMBAT TRAIND UNIT", "TRICEL", "INFECTED", "MALE UNIT".

FAVORET FOOD: King-sized Rib's

FAVORET COLOUR: Black (We told him this was a shade, but he refused to give a different answer)

FAVORET WEATHER: Cloudy

PREFERED PASS TIMES: Reaserching, Reading, quiet time to himself, beating around a CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT.

DISLIKES: REDFIELD UNIT's, things not going to plan, Being insulted, Most people

NOTE: there is a pre-installed program to increase respect to allow user's a bit of a head start and chance at using their ALBERT WESKER UNIT

MODLES AVAILABLE

S.T.A.R.S CAPTAIN: This modle comes with custom made S.T.A.R.S CAPTAIN uniform as seen in CAPCOM's "_Resident Evil 1 (REmake)_" game, however this model does not come with the ALBERT WESKER UNIT's TYRANT ABILITIES PACKAGE, which cannot be instaled (as it would include issuing samples of the T-Virus to civilians, to which the Pharmasutial Biuro has prohibited us from releasing), however, you may buy an other model with these powers and purhcase the 'S.T.A.R.S. CAPTAIN' kit to modify the ALBERT WESKER UNIT to your preferences. Code's and prices are included in the 'ADITIONAL PURHCASES' manual. Temporaribly compatable with all S.T.A.R.S. MEMBERS UNIT's, untill he betrays them.

CODE-V X: This moddle comes with standard Black combat uniform as seen in CAPCOM's game "_Resident Evil: Code-Veronica X._" Also include's TYRANT ABILITIES PACKAGE. This model may be more volitile to all REDFIELD UNIT's than other ALBERT WESKER UNIT models.

UC AND RE4: This is the Gray suit as seen in CAPCOM's "_Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicals_" and "_Resident Evil 4_" games. Also include the TYRANT ABILITIES PACKAGE. Expecialy adaptable to ADA WONG UNIT's and JACK KRAUSER UNIT's.

MIDNIGHT: This is his black leather outfit as seem in CAPCOM's "_Resident Evil 5_" game. Include's TYRANT ABILITIES PACKAGE as well as optional UROBOROS PACKAGE already installed, for those who are into that sort of thing. This is the only model that is compatable with EXCELLA GIONNE UNIT's and RICARDO IRVING UNIT's. Incredibly uncompatable with any OZWELL E SPENCER UNIT's.

All modles also include:

- 4x sets of spair sunglasses

- 1x custom made SAMURI EDGE (also purchesable for all other COMBAT TRAINED UNIT's at a reasonable price)

- 1x personalised S.T.A.R.S. knife.

- 1x black customised towel with his initials in gold.

- 5x Personalised slogan T-Shirts ("SHOOTING S.T.A.R.S.", "REDFIELDS SUCK!", "SUNGLASSES FTW",

"I IS GOD!", "CAN'T TOUCH THIS!")

- 1x other mode''s uniform of your choice.

Any aditional clothing or accessories can be purchased from the ADITIONAL PURCHESSES manual.

UNIT MATINENCE

HYGEINE: All UNIT's are perfectly capable of cleaning themselves (unless specified otherwise) However many UNIT's may be open to the idea of allowing their user to aid them in their cleaning. Thankfuly, the ALBERT WESKER UNIT is very open to this idea of their users aiding their hygenic matenence, expecialy if they are acting from their "SEDUCTION" Programing. However, if they do not wish for assistance, do not press the matter, this can cause your ALBERT WESKER UNIT to become volitial.

NUTRITION: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's have a general knowladge of how to cook, however, they do not like doing so. ALBERT WEKSER UNIT's can NOT be used as maids. ALBERT WESKER UNIT's will not cook for two, unless in a VERY generouse mood, normaly shortly after destroying a CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT. All in all, ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are perfectly capable of feading themselves, however will not argue with you doing the cooking for him (given your standard of cooking is satisfactory).

HEALTH: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's have the unique ability to regenerate, which allows him to heal at a rapid spead. No medical atention will be needed with your ALBERT WESKER UNIT. However, you aren't quite as lucky; remember that.

OPERATING PROGRAMS

REASERCHER: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are very intelegent, and have sufficiant knowladge in most subject's pre-installed, however they are very adiquate at learning more, and enjoys expanding his wide breath of knowledge. This program is most helpful for those users who are either still in within the education system, as you can have them help you with your projects. However, bribery and explaining how doing so would benefit him is needed during the request; he is a selfish twat, after all.

CAPTAIN: Do you feel your local police force need's a special devision, or just a general pep-up? This Program with urge your ALBERT WESKER UNIT to join the police force, start a S.T.A.R.S. like unit within the police force and perhaps solve afew mysteries whilst he's at it. CAUTION: Long-term results may vairy, not advisable if there are any CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's, JILL VALENTINE UNIT's or an UMBRELLA UNIT in youre vesinity. The S.T.A.R.S. CAPTAIN model is expecialy compatable with this program.

ASSASSIN: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are heartless, and are there for the perfect killing machienes. Bribery may be needed.

SEDUCTION: This is a sub-program for the ALBERT WESKER UNIT, which will have your ALBERT WESKER UNIT become very seductive towards it's user. Possibly the most populer program for ALBERT WESKER UNIT users. WARNING: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's like to be in control, although fighting encourages them to try and swoon you more, if you're seriouse about being in charge, we suggest either purchasing the OCC program from the ADITIONAL PURCHESES manual, or buying another UNIT.

GOD: This mode will make your ALBERT WESKER UNIT belive he is a god, and will insist you worship him as one. This program is not advisable, however, seem's to have a habit of proping up with the MIDNIGHT model; a glitch we have tried and failed to remove. If you find this program undesirable, order the "NO MORE BULLSHIT!" anti-program from the ADITIONAL PURCHASES section (also comes free with any CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT).

YAOI: This program comes with all MALE UNIT's, as an option if you have an other MALE UNIT within the household. This programing will change your ALBERT WESKER UNIT's sexuality to Homosexual (Or Bisexual, depending on your preferences) and will atract him to other MALE UNIT's either within the household or within your locality. Compatability varies between different MALE UNIT's.

PERVERT: this is strickly for the laughs. If you wish to watch your ALBERT WESKER UNIT harrass both MALE UNIT's and FEMALE UNIT's, then instal this. CAUTION: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's can get carried away with this program, when things become to much for the other UNIT's, un-instal imidiently. Expecialy compatable with REBECCA CHAMBERS UNIT's.

UNIT COMPATABILITY

ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are very much lone wolf's, and are not greatly compatable with most other UNIT's. This will outline several of the main relationships;

S.T.A.R.S. UNIT's: S.T.A.R.S. UNIT's are only compatable with CAPTAIN models, and even then it can be short lived.

WILLIAM BIRKIN UNIT: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are most compatable with this particular UNIT. Best choice if you wish to have a second UNIT or wanting your ALBERT WESKER UNIT to mate with a MALE UNIT.

JACK KRAUSER UNIT: There is a level of mutual 'boss-employee' respect between the JACK KRAUSER UNIT and the ALBERT WESKER UNIT. YAOI programing is possible.

ADA WONG UNIT: Compatability vairies between meeting's between these two UNIT's. Results show mostly positive results.

EXCELLA GIONNE: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's dislike's the flirtatiouse EXCELLA GIONNE UNIT, however, will use her infatuation with him to his advantage, for as long as he see's fit. As she is crushing your ALBERT WESKER UNIT, she will hang on his every sylible and whim, but it's likely that your ALBERT WESKER UNIT will terminate your EXCELLA GIONNE UNIT within a space of time, which is yet to be discovered. Proceed with caution.

SHERRY BIRKIN: Compatability is high, but mearly in an 'Uncle-neice' relationship. Although not related SHERRY BIRKIN UNIT's hold high, uncle-like regards for ALBERT WESKER UNIT's. Advisable PARENTING UNIT should your ANNETTE BIRKING UNIT or WILLIAM BIRKIN UNIT malfunction and deasiese.

BARRY BURTON: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's are long-term blackmailing BARRY BURTON UNIT's. Compatability is moderate, although it is within forced sircumstances.

JILL VALENTINE: Compatable with CAPTAIN model, strongly dislikes all other models. However, JILL VALENTINE UNIT BATTLESUIT model is inesplicably seceptable to an ALBERT WESKER UNIT's comands, most specificaly his MIDNIGHT model.

CLAIRE REDFIELD UNIT: ALBERT WESKER UNIT's dispises all REDFIELD UNIT's. Compatability is VERY low.

CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT: DO NOT ALLOW ALBERT WESKER UNIT'S AND CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT'S TO CROSS PATHS! These two UNIT's are VERY volitile to each other! Owning both is NOT advised. YAOI programing is even week to these UNIT. See "OOC" program in the ADITIONAL PURCHASES manual, it improves the attitude of both UNIT's to one another greatly.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Q: I baught an item from the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT wardrobe for my ALBERT WESKER UNIT to try on, cause I thougth he'd look cute in it, but he refuses to ware it.

A: apart from the fact that it is from the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT wardrobe? Wesker units are particularly stubourne about what they ware. Purchase the "COSPLAY" Program from the ADITIONAL PURCHASES manual; and be alittle more adventurouse whilst you're at it.

Q: What are the 'alternate payment options'?

A: Organ donation. Here at CAPCOMS "RESIDENT EVIL UNIT PRODUCTION DEPARTMENT" We are close partners with the Umbrella Corporation. You can offer from small parts of your organs to your whole body after your death to pay for the costs you cannot cover with money. It's a very good serves.

Q: My ALBERT WESKER UNIT is cowering in the corner and keeps muttering about how we're all gonna die. He layed an egg the other day o.0?

A: He has be installedwith the wrong programing. It apeares to have been installed with the BRAD VICKERS UNIT programing. send us the recipt for your ALBERT WESKER UNIT and we'll send you back the correct programing. simply remove the BRAD VICKERS UNIT programing and replace it with his true programing. Please send us the BRAD VICKERS UNIT programing back. (This is FQA, because we have a prankster within the organisation who like to mix up the programing, for the lulz)

TROUBLESHOOTING

PROBLEM: I had a CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT before I purchased my ALBERT WESKER UNIT, and he's disapeared.

SOLUTION: If the ALBERT WESKER UNIT cooked dinner the following night, your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT it most sertinly dead, I recomend purchasing an other CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT along with the OOC program for your ALBERT WESKER UNIT. No worries, you get a 60% discount under the 'WESKER-PWNED' policy, which is obtainable in the event that an ALBERT WESKER UNIT has murdered another unit within your care, send us reciepts for both UNIT's and we'll apply the discout to your new purchase. However, if you have not be offered dinner as of yet, check anywhere your ALBERT WEKSER UNIT may have tied up and is torturing your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, you're bound to find him (we still recomend the OOC program though).

If you have any more FQA or TROUBLESHOOTING questions, please leave a coment ^v^'' I couldn't think of many.


	3. CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT MANUAL

**AN: **Fanfictions editing systems bieng glitchy on me (thus why AFTER I spellchecked it, Weskers Unit Manual had typos *fumes*). so yeah, I'll find an way around that if it desiced to fuzzle up this time.

*goes and checks*

ok, so it did. just my computer then -.- So yeha, typo free (mostly) Chris file. ENJOY.

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**CHRIS UNIT GUIDE**

MANUAL NO: 2423 G00D CR  
UNIT: CHRIS REDFIELD  
PRICE: $200.00 (for alternate payment options, please contact our help line stated on packaging)  
MANUFACTURER: CAPCOM:UNIT PRODUCTION DEPARTMENT

MAKERS NOTE

Good day and thank you for purchasing your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, we do hope you enjoy your unit to a satisfactory level. In this manual we will be giving you critical tips and guidance to having a long and happy existence with your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT. It is advised that you read this manual, as it will help you to maintain a healthy relationship with your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT.

UNIT SPECIFICS

NAME: Chris Redfield

MANUFACTURED SINCE: 1973

HEIGHT: 5ft 11inches (181cm)

WEIGHT: 177ibs (80.5kilograms) (216ibs (98kilograms) if ordering a model with muscles)

BASE APPEARANCE: Male Caucasian, Brunette, short hair, styled differently between models, deep blue eyes. Stature changes between models, in some he is well toned, in others he is VERY buff, with stubble.

UNIT SUB-GROUPS: RESIDENT EVIL, , , , , COMBAT TRAINED UNIT, REDFIELD UNIT, MALE UNIT, HUMAN

FAVORITE FOOD: Beef stake with chips and salad

FAVORET COLOUR: Green

FAVORITE WEATHER: Sunny

PREFERRED PASS TIMES: Shooting down at the firing range, working out, watching TV, Hanging out with other compatible UNIT's.

DISLIKES: ALBERT WEKSER UNIT's, hunting done ALBERT WESKER UNIT's, watching people suffer, being accused of taking steroids.

MODELS AVAILABLE

S.T.A.R.S.: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT is clad in his S.T.A.R.S. Uniform as seen in CAPCOM's 'Resident evil1' and 'Resident Evil REmake' games. If you have the 'Resident Evil 5' version in mind, order CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT MERCENARIES model. This UNIT is compatible with all S.T.A.R.S. UNIT's, as well as ALBERT WESKER UNIT's CAPTAIN model, although compatibility is short lived.

CODE-V: the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT will be dressed in his standard uniform as seen in the CAPCOM game Resident Evil: CODE: Veronica'. Extremely incompatible with ALBERT WESKER UNIT's and any ASHFORD UNIT's, especially ALEXIA ASHFORD UNIT's.

BSAA: this is the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT as you see him in CAPCOM's Resident Evil 5' game. Also comes with MUSCLE PACKAGE. One of the only CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT model that interacts with SHEVA ALOMAR UNIT's and JOSH STONE UNIT's.

MERCENARIES: This is a special pack that includes all costumes as seem in 'Resident Evil 5', mini games 'Mercinaries' and 'Mercenaries: Reunion' for his character, as well a guides and tools to accomplishing the other hair styles. Comes with MUSCLE PACKAGE. One of the only CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT models that interact with SHEVA ALOMAR UNIT's and JOSH STONE UNIT's. Because of the large costume package, standard price raises to $275.00.

All Models also include:  
- 1x handgun of the users choice.  
- 1x "Made in heaven" Brown jacket  
- 1x Combat knife  
- 1x green customized towel with the BSAA North American branch emblem embroiled onto it.  
- 5x Personalised slogan T-Shirts ("GO GREEN!", "HULK SMASH!", "?", "100% AMERICAN BEEF!", "UMBRELLAS GOING DOWN!")  
- 1x other model's uniform of your choice (only one of the costumes if you pick from the MERCENARIES Model)  
- 1x starter medical kit  
- 1x NO MORE BULLSHIT! Anti-program to the ALBERT WESKER UNIT's program.  
- 1x JUST PARTNERS Anti-romance program for the JILL VALENTINE UNIT's and SHEVA ALOMAR UNIT's.

Any aditional purchases and accessorries can be purchased in ADITIONAL PURCHASES.

UNIT MAINTENANCE

HYGIENE: Most UNIT's are perfectly capable of cleaning themselves (unless specified otherwise) and most are open to the idea of their user aiding their cleaning process. CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's are relatively open to the idea, but will possibly be embarrassed with the option being put out there for him. If he Say's no, feel free to press (and possibly sneak in whilst he's not looking) but if he seam's very against the idea at any point, stand down, or it could hurt your relationship level with your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT.

NUTRITION: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's knowledge of cooking is minimal, and it's advisable you have the fire department on speed-dial should you chose to have him cook anything that isn't of a basic culinary level. They are proud UNIT's, however, and may argue against you offering to cook meal's after you'd done them for a long period, as his programming insists that he doesn't like to be looked after at such a level. MAID Programming is available for this UNIT.

HEALTH: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's have a strange magnetism to danger, and find themselves being beaten around the bush on a regular basis (normally at the hands of an ALBERT WESKER UNIT). It is advisable that you buy a medical kit (or maybe even a hospital wing) around the same period as purchasing a CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, especially if you know of an ALBERT WERSKER UNIT within the vicinity of your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's residence. Small starter medic kit is included with all models.

OPERATING PROGRAMS

SPECIAL OP: This program will put your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT'S Marksman skills to good use. When this program is activated, your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT will wish to join the best special task force in the vicinity of the home. This can range from a special task force in your local police department to the air force. If there is a S.T.A.R.S. Unit available at your local police station your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT will default to entry there. WARNING: for various reasons, a CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's stay in any task force almost always be short lived.

FITNESS INSTRUCTOR: Feeling over weight? This program is PERFECT for you. This will cause your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT to act like your personal fitness instructor, and encourage you to eat healthier and exercise more often, and you will be regularly invited to train with him (which is always worth the hard work ladies). Most compatible with the BSAA and MERCENARIES models for the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT.

JET PILOT: Got a private jet? Need an unpaid pilot? CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's (as they have been in the air force) have jet piloting experience, and are therefor perfect for the job. Best used for when escaping exploding facilities in southern frozen wastelands.

SEDUCTION: This is a sub-program for the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, which will have your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT ecome very seductive towards it's user. Possibly the most populer program for CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT users. Can play both role's in sexual intercourse, although prefers to be on top, rather than on the bottom.

PROTECTIVE OLDER BROTHER: Confused? Read the tin again! This program will turn your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT into a protective older brother. If you develop a sibling-like relationship with your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, this will happen automatically. It isn't an advised program, but it comes in handy when you have an annoying ex that just won't get off your back.

YAOI: This program comes with all MALE UNIT's, as an option if you have an other MALE UNIT within the household. This programing will change your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's sexuality to Homosexual (Or Bisexual, depending on your preferences) and will attract him to other MALE UNIT's either within the household or within your locality. Compatibility varies between different MALE UNIT's.

CAPTAIN OBVIOUS: This program will urge your CHRIS REDIELD UNIT to state the obvious; for example, pointing out the fact your Waring a bullet proof vest, when it's so clear your waring a bullet proof vest, right after said bullet proof vest saved your non-bullet proof life. This program is extremely effective if you wish to annoy someone, without putting the effort into being annoying. CAUTION: Other, more VIOLENT UNIT's can become agitated by this very quickly, and will damage your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT. When this ooccurs, deactivate immediately. This program is especially compatible with REBECCA CHAMBERS UNITS.

UNIT COMPATIBILITY

CHRIS REDFIELD UNITS are particularly trustworthy and friendly, and therefor gets on with most UNIT's. A few of the main UNIT compatibilities are listed below:

S.T.A.R.S.: As the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT is a part of the STARS UNIT sub-grouping, he is compatible with all STARS UNITS and co-operates effectively with them. Results may vary for ALBERT WESKER UNIT's.

UMBRELLA: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's don't co-operate with UMBRELLA UNIT's. Procied with caution when he comes into contact with one.

BSAA: As a member of the BSAA UNIT's sub-grouping, CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's will co-operate with all UNIT's from this sub-grouping.

JILL VALENTINE: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's are extremely compatible with this UNIT, so much so it can bbecome a romantic involvement. If you are seeking a romantic relationship with your CHRIS REDFEILD UNIT, then I suggest either avoiding any JILL VALENTINE UNIT's or installing the 'JUST PARTNERS' Anti-program to prevent the two becoming romantically involved, and stay as 'just partners'.

CLAIRE REDFIELD: It's his sister; 'nuff said.

REBECCA CHAMBERS: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's co-operate effectively with REBECCA CHAMBERS UNIT's, and takes care of them, like he would a little sister.

SHEVA ALOMAR: CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's partner against crime when there is no JILL VALENTINE UNIT available. Lot's of co-operation, compatibility high, romantic involvement possible if the CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT isn't all ready within a romantic relationship. Also romantically avoidable when installing the JUST PARTNERS Anti-program.

ALBERT WESKER: AVOID AT ALL COSTS! ALBERT WESKER UNIT's and CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's DO NOT get along! Having both, or being within the vicinity of an ALBERT WESKER UNIT will most likely proceed to either constant damage to your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT at the hands of the ALBERT WESKER UNIT, or possibly even the destruction of your CHRIS REDFEILD UNIT. Only partially compatible with the ALBERT WEKSER UNIT CAPTAIN model, and only if your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT is a STARS model. Install YAOI program if you wish for your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT to be infatuated with the ALBERT WESKER UNIT, but he will not return his feelings.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Q: How do I know if my CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT is compatible with the purchases I want from the ADDITIONAL PURCHASES Manual?  
A: There is a generalised grid at the back of the ADDITIONAL PURCHASES manual which illustrates the compatibility of groups with groupings of purchasables, but if you still have doubts you can check at our website /unit-store/Resident-Evil and select the purchase you wish to make and the UNIT you plan to issuing it to, it will tell you weather or not it is compatible (as well as size wearable to the UNIT's size)

Q: CHRIS HATES CLAIRE! WHAT I DOO?

A: Has your CLAIRE REDFIELD UNIT be courted by an ALBERT WESKER UNIT? If so, hem ay of found out about the relationship. CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT's are very wary of anyone in close contact with an ALBERT WEKSER UNIT, even his sister. The only fix for this situation is a complete Re-boot of all three units. Remove all ADDITIONAL PROGRAMS and shut down the UNIT's. I'm sorry you have to start again with youre UNIT's, but please be careful not to allow your ALBERT WEKSER UNIT and CLAIRE REDFIELD UNIT to get to close to each other (and avoid OOC programing, this normaly results in situations like this).

Q: I got an Early model, and I've decided I want my Chris to beef up, but he isn't working out enough to buff up quick enough!

A: Have no fear! Steroids are here! Now, we must stress that we dont' approve of drug taking. Simply purchase the 'STEROIDS' PROGRAM, which will encourage your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT to go to the gym more, work out, and his muscle mass will increase at the pace anticipated when one takes steroids, without the rather disappointing repercussions. Do NOT go out and buy amounts of the actual drug for yourself, CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT;s are VERY self richous, and will NOT result to taking drugs for whatever reason.

TROUBLESHOOTING

PROBLEM: My CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT won't stop being overprotective!  
SOLUTION: The deactivation program for the OVERPROTECTIVE OLDER BROTHER program has faulted and won't turn off. To fix this, send us the receipt for your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT, and you will get a 90% discount when purchasing a CLAIRE REDFIELD UNIT or REBECCA CHAMBERS UNIT under the 'BROTHERLY DESTRACTION' clause for when this happens. Having one of these UNIT's within the household will turn his attention to said UNIT, and his attention off you. Problem solved.

PROBLEM: CHRIS KISSED WESKER . *Barf*

SOLUTION: Normally fans dont' find this a bad thing... strange... anyways, if you have installed the YAOI or OC program, then that is the problem; uninstal imidiently. If you have done neither of these then your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT has a MAJOR personality fault. Please send your CHRIS REDFIELD UNIT back, and we shall send a replacement. All postage and packaging is payed by us in circumstances like this.

If you have any more FQA or TROUBLESHOOTING questions, please leave a comment ^v^'' I couldn't think of many.

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I FINALY GOT IT DONE XD yayz. Anyway, comment please ^^ thank you


End file.
